


(be it for reason) be it for love

by mischief7manager



Series: but for now let's all pretend [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Bisexual Character, Bisexual Female Character, Bisexuality, Character Study, F/F, F/M, Siblings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-09
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-05-12 18:22:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5675971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mischief7manager/pseuds/mischief7manager
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"The first time Vex is caught in an intimate encounter, her partner is a stable boy, and she promises not to do it again. The second time, her partner is a lady's maid, and she doesn't bother with the lie."</p>
<p>A character study.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(be it for reason) be it for love

**Author's Note:**

> I joined a new fandom and promptly decided to rub my bisexual little hands all over it. Title from "My Silver Lining" by First Aid Kit, used by Laura Bailey in her Vex'ahlia character playlist. Spoilers through episode 35.

       The first time Vex is caught in an intimate encounter, her partner is a stable boy, and she promises not to do it again. The second time, her partner is a lady's maid, and she doesn't bother with the lie.

  
       This is in Singorn, when their father still held out hope that she and Vax could eventually be made presentable. Vax responds to these attempts by throwing knives into expensive tapestries for "target practice." Vex prefers to vent her frustrations in more enjoyable pursuits. She doesn't get many opportunities for that kind of fun when they hit the road, and once they return to their mother's village... Well. Neither of the twins is much interested in fun after that.

 

* * *

 

       It takes the rest of the party (not Vox Machina, not yet) a surprisingly long time to figure it out. Not that Vex is hiding it or anything, it just never seems to come up. She winks at guards, and barkeeps, and merchants, all of whom happen to be men, and if the others make assumptions because of it, that's their problem. And anyway, the less they know about her, the better. They're working together because they all make more money this way. It doesn't mean they're _friends_.

  
       They put it together eventually, of course. A serving girl strikes up a conversation with her when they're in the tavern, celebrating their latest haul, and of course Vex flirts back. That's when the penny drops.

  
       Grog looks confused, until Scanlan pulls him down and says something in his ear, at which point he grins and gives her two enthusiastic, slightly lecherous, thumbs up. Scanlan offers to give her advice on "pleasing a lady" which rapidly devolves into her throwing chunks of food at him while he protests the depth and breadth of his experience. Tiberius blusters, Keyleth blushes, Pike makes an uncomfortably sincere attempt to get them to stop making fun of her. This is rather undercut by Vax taking the opportunity to "accidentally" tip his mug of ale down the back of his sister's cloak, which neatly redirects attention to the sibling slap fight that ensues.

  
       Percy just rolls his eyes, but he's the one to come to her room later, knocking softly and closing the door behind him when he enters. He pauses, taking in the sight of her on the bed, the picture of casual nonchalance. "This doesn't change the way any of us think of you. You know that, right?"

  
       Vex scoffs. "What a relief. I'm sure if I placed any value in the way you lot think of me, I'd be touched."

  
       (She _is_ touched. She thinks, by the soft smile he gives her as he leaves, Percy knows it too. The thought doesn't bother her as much as she expected it would.)

 

* * *

 

       Zahra is a problem. First because Vex hates her, and then because she doesn't.

  
       It's just-- it's been awhile since she had any sustained interaction with anyone outside of Vox Machina, longer still since she had any encounters that went further than a _wink_ , and once she gets past the initial frostiness (hah. frostiness.) with Zahra, she can't help but like her. There's a similarity there, a kinship between two women made hard by the world around them. Seeing Zahra soften as they keep watch, Vex thinks idly about what the tiefling might do if she made a pass. Some women, she knows, don't take kindly to flirtations from other women, but Zahra strikes her as the sort to react the same to advances from any gender. Probably just keep that whole sardonic aloof thing going.

  
       In years past, Vex would have cranked up the charm and damn the consequences, but-- She's older now. She doesn't take lovers just to piss off her father anymore, and the risk of burning a bridge with a potential ally and losing the take outweighs any personal desire on her part.

  
       Later, though, when Lilith passes on her cousin's message, Vex will allow herself a moment, just a moment, to wonder.

 

* * *

 

       She really does just kiss Grog to shut him up, and she stands by that decision. Despite her brother's later heckling. And the wicked hangover the next day.

  
       She kisses Percy the first time in the spur of the moment. Three exploding arrows and a grapple, she got excited, whatever. Vax kissed him first. And if the kissing Percy thing happens a couple more times, well. That’s nobody’s business but hers.

  
       (Vex has told exactly three people in her entire life that she loves them. Two are related to her and the other is a bear. She wonders sometimes if she should be worried about that.)

 

* * *

 

       She's not angry with her brother. Not really. She's not even angry with Keyleth, although judging by the space she's kept between them lately, the druid doesn't know that. The thing is-- Her whole life, Vax has been her number one person, and she's been his. Whatever else happened, they had each other to rely on, to have at their side. And sooner or later, Keyleth is going to finish her Aramente and leave Vox Machina, and when she does, if Vax decides to go with her--

  
       Vax is Vex's number one person. The thought that she might not be his, anymore, scares her worse than the Briarwoods and the Beholder combined. Her brother may be a master of stealth, but when it comes to matters of the heart, he's about as subtle as Pike in plate armor. He is as shameless flirting with Gilmore as he is making googly eyes at Keyleth, and Vex would envy the ease with which he displays his affections so openly if she didn't find the whole business nauseating on principle. Vex hasn't had the luxury of being vulnerable for a long time.

  
       She’s watching them after the battle, trying to steer herself away from this particularly depressing train of thought, when she feels Percy take a seat next to her on the bench. She’s been there for a bit, Trinket laid down beside her happily munching on some meat one of the villagers gave him. The festivities are in full swing now, people bringing out whatever food and drink they have. A small band has struck up in a corner of the central square, and couples are already pairing off to dance. Percy silently hands her a tankard of ale and she takes a drink, eyes remaining on what looks like a frightfully awkward conversation going on under the Sun Tree.

  
       After a moment, Percy speaks. “It’ll be alright, you know.” At her look, he nods towards Vax and Keyleth. “Whatever happens between them, he’s still your brother.”

  
       Vex snorts. “ _You’re_ giving me advice on sibling relationships?” She regrets it as soon as she says it, and takes another sip of ale to cover her grimace. She can charm her way past guards, barkeeps, and merchants, but when it comes to the people that matter, she always seems to end up foot firmly in mouth. Percy, of all people, deserves better than being the focus of her misplaced frustration. 

 

       Luckily, he's used to her bluntness. “I have to start somewhere,” he chuckles. “Perhaps do as I say and not as I do?”

  
       Vex shrugs. “You seem to be doing alright.” Percy follows her gaze to Cassandra, in conversation with Scanlan next to the band. They watch in silence for a moment, taking in Cassandra’s amused expression as Scanlan gestures ever more emphatically, presumably relaying some tale of his exploits, guaranteed to be more tall tale than truth.

  
       “You forgave her,” Vex says softly. She feels Percy turn to her, but she doesn’t look at him, focusing instead on the ale swirling in her tankard. “After everything. After she left you.”

  
       Percy is quiet for a moment. Vex glances over to find him watching Cassandra again, his face softer than she’s seen in a very long time. “Of course I did,” he says at last. He meets her gaze, then nods back at the Sun Tree. “You’d do the same, wouldn’t you?”

  
       They watch as Vax turns and walks out from under the branches, leaving Keyleth standing next to the tree alone. He catches Vex’s eye as he goes, gives her a nod and a small smile.

  
       “Yes,” she says. “I suppose I would.”

  
       As if sensing the tension, Trinket sits up and drops his massive head onto her shoulder, snuffling affectionately against the side of her face. She gives him a scratch behind the ears, then shrieks when he licks her from chin to temple. “Trinket!” Percy bursts into laughter as she shoves her companion away, wiping bear slobber off on her sleeve with a disgusted “Ugh.”

  
       “So,” Percy says once she’s sufficiently dried herself. “What’s next? Dancing? Eating? Mingling with the townsfolk?” He gives her a meaningful look, and tips his tankard to her. “Plenty of lads and lasses around who’d be more than happy to show one of the rescuers of Whitestone their gratitude.”

  
       He always says it like that. “Lads and lasses.” No hesitation, no judgement, just another fact of who she is, as important and irrelevant as her skill with a bow or her obsession with money, and after everything they’ve just been through, Vex is so grateful for this bit of normalcy she can barely contain it. Without thinking, she presses a firm kiss to Percy’s cheek.

  
        When she pulls away, he’s doing that wide-eyed blinking thing he does whenever he’s caught off guard. She takes no small pleasure in being the cause of it. “What on earth was that for?”

  
       She smiles. “For being Percival Frederickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III.”

  
       To her astonishment, he actually blushes. “Ah, yes. I had wondered if I heard you correctly, back there. Hardly anyone gets the whole thing right.”

  
       Vex grins, and tosses her hair over her shoulder. “You should know by now, darling. I’m not _hardly anyone_.”

 

       “Indeed not.” He smiles at her, then stands up and offers her his hand. “Well, Vex? Shall we go see what merriment Whitestone has to offer?”

  
       Vex looks at him, then around the square. Keyleth has been drawn into Scanlan and Cassandra’s conversation, and appears to be vehemently denying one of his exaggerations over his fervent protest, while Cassandra laughs. Grog has tapped the cask of ale from the bag of holding and is filling glasses left and right. Next to him, Pike shimmers in her glowing avatar form, grinning broadly at the joy around her. Vax has vanished, but Vex can’t bring herself to worry. He always comes back, in the end.

  
       She takes Percy’s hand, allows him to pull her to her feet.

       

       “Alright,” she says. “Let’s go.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting fic since I was 13 and on hpffn, so please be gentle with me. I'm @mischiefseven on twitter and mischief7manager on tumblr, if you feel like reading some more of my ramblings, some of which are about Critical Role and a lot of which are about bisexuality. Thanks for reading!


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